GARY JONAS - TOO SHORT BIO
Gary Jonas lives.

GARY JONAS - JUST RIGHT BIO
Gary Jonas writes novels, short stories and screenplays. His first novel ONE WAY TICKET TO MIDNIGHT is now available from Yard Dog Press. His stories have been published in many anthologies and magazines. For a complete list, click here.

GARY JONAS - TOO LONG BIO
Gary Jonas was born in 1963. He sold his first story, "Mending Wounds" to Marion Zimmer Bradley for the anthology SWORD & SORCERESS VII (DAW Books 1990). The book took so long to come out that two later stories saw print first. The first tale into print was "By Death Abused" released as a limited edition chapbook-the first of the Roadkill Press line. Since then, he has sold many stories, articles, reviews and even artwork to various anthologies and magazines. His work has been translated into Italian, German and Japanese.

For several years, it seemed like every magazine that accepted one of his stories died a horrible death. This eventually led to a mini-collection chapbook called CURSE OF THE MAGAZINE KILLERS (Ozark Triangle Press 1998). Fortunately, magazines started surviving, so there haven't been any sequels (you can see them now-RETURN or REVENGE or STRIKE BACK or what have you). Aren't you glad the world was spared such a fate?

We could go on and on about Gary's many and varied accomplishments, but we'd have to make them up since he's really just a regular guy and hasn't done much of any interest. Hey, that's why he writes. He gets to live vicariously through the characters, throwing magic around or slaying vampires or even getting dates. He doesn't fly airplanes. He's no match for Jackie Chan in the martial arts. He can paint, though not as well as Van Gogh-but at least he has both ears. He knows at least three chords on his guitar, but who doesn't? He can draw, but he's no Neal Adams. He's quite a movie buff, in fact, we've heard stories that he watches movies in the buff, but that has not been verified.

If you've read this far, you can officially claim that you've wasted far more of your life on this bio than you ever should have. Feel free to explore the rest of the website now.

Why are you reading this paragraph? Didn't you see the line about exploring the rest of the site? This is a waste of your time. There are no secrets revealed in here. Well, there could be secrets hidden in the next paragraph, but you shouldn't read that one.

Still here? You really are a glutton for punishment! All right, since you've stuck it out to the end, it's only fair that you learn a secret. If you run your cursor along the bottom of this page, you'll find a hidden link that will take you to a bonus story. Don't tell anyone about the link, though. They need to waste as much of their life here as you have. That's the only way to earn the extra tale. As a side note, there are hidden links to other stories on some of the other sections of the site. See how many you can find. We now return you to your regularly scheduled website. Now go already. There's nothing else here. Really.

If you're reading this, you need to get a life.