Tuesday, July 13th, 1999

Yeah, I went to the Emergency Room. Remember when I mentioned that I had been throwing up? Well, I kept doing it. I could not keep anything down except rice cakes (saltines wouldn't stay down) and flat ginger ale.

Fast forward to Monday Night. I'm shaking, dizzy and starving. I have no energy to write, and I can't concentrate on the words in front of me. Tim Powers and Karen Joy Fowler are on the balcony in the lounge next door to my room, but I can't socialize because all I want to do is cry.

I try calling the local urgent care line, but they don't want to talk to me because I'm out of network. Out of desperation, I call my urgent care line in Minneapolis, and tell them that I keep throwing up and that I'm in my second trimester of pregnancy and that I don't know what to do. After determining that I probably did not have the stomach flu, they tell me to go see a doctor.

No problem, I think. I had my HMO pre-authorize payment on an out-of-network doctor's visit before I left, so I figure that I can find a doctor in the morning and avoid the emergency room altogether. Nope. The next morning, I get told bluntly by several receptionists that if I fill out all their paperwork, maybe a doctor could see me in three weeks. So I go off to the Emergency Room, because that is the only hope I have of seeing an obstetrician.

My fellow Clarionite angels of mercy, Sharon and Simone, agree to take me to the ER because I am too dizzy to drive myself. We arrive in the ER at 9:00am, and are the only people in the waiting room except two guys who get pissed when I try to turn off the television. "Hey," one of them shouts, "what's the matter, don't you like Springer?"

I don't, but I apologize and turn the ghastly show back on. The topic of this particular episode is "Secret Lovers Exposed" where people boast of their extra-marital affairs to their poor spouses. Why do people agree to ruin their lives and those of their loved ones by appearing on that show? Am I missing something? I still have not found the answer to this, but I think I now understand why ugly daytime talk shows are so popular in waiting rooms. The whole time the show is on, I keep thinking, My God, look at all the people out there who are even more messed up than I am. After four straight days of vomiting and feeling sorry for myself, this is rather therapeutic.

The waiting room fills up. One thing that I never before appreciated is just how low "starvation" ranks on the Emergency Room triage scale. People come. People go. I stay.

Nobody sees me until two in the afternoon, when Sharon demands to know why I have not been seen yet. It turns out the ER staff have lost my chart and forgotten that I was there. Oops, they say. You really should have been seen two hours ago.

Finally, I see nurses and a real live doctor! They want to know if I've been tested for pregnancy yet. Yes, I say. I'm in my second trimester. They ask me if I'm sure. Do I know that vomiting like this is really unusual in the second trimester? I remind them that this is why I'm in the damned ER. I pull out photocopies of my medical records from my home clinic and tell them they can read the records of my test results if they want. Note to travelers: get your doctor to photocopy your medical records so that you can take them with you. Nothing floors an ER staff more than to have an out of state patient present them with complete medical records.

Now that everyone knows that I'm pregnant, the examination begins in earnest. They do check-ups on both me and the baby. I get blood tests and they hook me up to an IV. I get prescribed an anti-nausea medication that is safe for pregnancy. The test results come back. They tell me I am remarkably healthy for someone who is so dehydrated. They continue pumping fluids into me via the IV. I begin to feel human again. The diagnosis: "I have no idea why you were vomiting. Use the anti-nausea medication if you need it. If you still keep vomiting, come back."

Epilogue

We left the ER at 4pm, and I managed to keep down the rice and clear broth I had for dinner. Am I glad I went to the ER? Yeah, I am. I needed those fluids, and it is good to know that the baby is okay.

Unfortunately, I'm going to have to work on gaining weight again. Guess who managed to drop back down to her pre-pregnancy weight this week? My fellow Clarionites have threatened to force feed me massive doses of ice cream. Once my stomach recovers, I might even take them up on it.

Hmm