Amethysm

There are Roman Catholic Amethysts, Buddhist Amethysts, Agnostic Amethysts, Druid Amethysts,and very probably a few Amethysts who would insist they are Atheists. The happiest among us tend to be those who acknowledge some higher power, but there is no agreement, nor is there meant to be, on the specific nature of that Presence. It is not our job to reduce the Presence to one name acceptable to all.

Amethysts for the most part live by only a few simple rules, the strictest of which is adherence to rigorous personal integrity.

We believe in loving kindness, not as a display to show the wonderfulness of ourselves, or as a rule to be obeyed against our will or judgment, but as a way of thought through which we see ourselves in others and learn to appreciate the sameness in our differences. An appreciation of the diversity of humankind combined with an understanding of the basic samenesses leads inevitably, if adhered to rigorously and with an open mind, to great personal satisfaction.

This does not mean we are generous in our thoughts, because it does not require generosity to recognize ourselves in others, and it is a healthy instinct to regard with loving kindness the self so seen. Nor does it mean that we try to know how we would behave or feel in another's place; what we try to know is how we would behave or feel if we were that other. There is a difference.

We do not believe in grudging sacrifice. To be a martyr may be holy, but to feel like a martyr is not. Sacrifice anything, up to and including your life, if you can give it joyously. But a gift given only in expectation of glory or reward is destructive to all parties involved.

Gifts are fine, even gifts that appear to others to be sacrifices. But if the feeling of sacrifice is stronger than the feeling of satisfaction attained by giving, then it is not a gift. Both the recipient and the Presence will be better pleased by a small thing given joyously than by a large thing given resentfully or grudgingly, or in expectation of praise.

Nor is prolonged guilt useful. It is healthy to recognize one's errors and to learn from them. It serves no purpose to dwell on them past the learning, or to cause oneself misery over them. Misery does not undo wrong deeds, and it hampers one's ability to perform right deeds. A rueful awareness of one's human capacity for error, and a willingness to forgive oneself as readily as one would forgive another once the lesson is learned, is all that is required.

Sometimes a wrong can be mended if one is clearheaded, open minded, and capable of self-forgiveness. Sometimes it cannot, no matter how correct one's thoughts. In the latter case nothing is gained by dwelling on the situation: it is best to learn from the experience, make what amends one can, and move on.

Copyright © 1992-2005 by Melisa Michaels. Reproduction and distribution specifically prohibited. All rights reserved. Melisa Michaels is the author of the science fiction novels Skirmish, First Battle, Last War, Pirate Prince, Floater Factor, Far Harbor, and World-Walker, the fantasy novels Cold Iron and Sister to the Rain, and the mystery novel Through the Eyes of the Dead.