The Interstellar Woman of Mystery

The Story of the Interstellar Woman of Mystery

The Interstellar Woman of Mystery.
Original photo by Darlene Hall

Somewhere along the path of my writing career, after a couple of interviews
with Jon Klement on DragonTalkRadio, he decided I was "mysterious," in an
alluring sort of way, and promptly dubbed me the International Woman of Mystery.
This had a nice ring to it, and since I tend to incorporate mysteries into my science
fiction writing, seemed apropos, so I promptly appropriated that title as well!

Then, in the chat room for DragonTalkRadio, during the interview of my
friend Deborah Smith Ford, another friend, Herika Raymer, upgraded that title to
INTERSTELLAR Woman of Mystery, and Jon and Deb approved on the air - as did I.
So now, I am Stephanie Osborn, Alien Changeling and Interstellar Woman of Mystery!

To a very, VERY small group of people, I am known as the Alien Changeling.

What is an alien changeling?

A changeling, in European (specifically Celtic) mythology and folklore is a
fairy or elven child who, while still an infant, is switched in the cradle for
a human child. The human is taken to the fairy world, while the fae is raised
as a human. Unfortunately, usually the fae person never quite fits in.

An alien changeling is a changeling who, never mind being a different Earth
species, comes from another world, or even another dimension. This is me.

I was placed here as an invisible scout from the 8th Dimension, watching
Earth for signs it was ready to join the Galactic Confederation. While this
was happening, I was struck by an inter-dimensional power feedback while
observing NASA flight controllers. It promptly rendered me into the form of
those I observed, and I became human - almost.

Now I have to write my experiences as a scout to protect myself from idiots
and detractors, as well as make a living with the help of my personal mad
scientist, Doc Osborn, until I can again gain access to the cyclotron and
initiate an inter-dimensional counter-feedloop. Then all I have to do is
access the quantum foam, hop on a brane and quantum-mechanically fold
space so I can get back to the 8th dimension. Doc Osborn will, of course, be
coming with me.

BWAAA-hahahaha!





The real story:

Changelings in folklore are as I have described them. Some years back, when
I was working as a Shuttle payload flight controller, one of the branch
managers, noting my "difference in style" from most of the people I work
with, and himself being a SF fan, described me as an Alien Changeling.
Rather than take exception to the description, I took it to heart and made
it my title. I thought it would be fun, as a SF writer, to incorporate it as a
fun bit of "lore" about me - a touch of imaginative mystique, if you will.

Okay, this is something I just HAD to add. A Facebook friend known publicly as
Speaker to Lab Animals recently nailed me in a post. This is a reproduction of that post.

How Novelist Stephanie Osborn orders pizza!

"OK, people, clock is holding at T-minus 10 minutes, I need a Go-NoGo."

"Booster?"

"Go, Flight."

"Packaging?"

"We're Go."

"Crust?"

"Go!"

"Sauce?"

"We're Go, Flight!"

"*TOP*pings?"

"Uh, NoGo, Flight, we've got a Caution-and-Warning on the Extra Cheese."

[mutterings]

"Hold it. Let's work the problem. Toppings, is it a glitch?"

"No, Flight. I'm reading an overpressure on the Number Two Mozzarella tank."

"Cape, this is Vandenberg, we've got a bird on the pad ready to go. It's a pepperoni mission for the boys in Langley, but we can divert."

"Thank you, Vandenberg, we'll keep that in mind."

"Flight? This is EECOM, we could try having Delivery Boy switch 'SCE' to 'Aux'."

"Hmm. How about it, Delivery?"

"Switching 'Supernumerary Cheese Enrichment' to 'Auxilliary.' Roger, Flight."

"Toppings?"

"That's got it Flight. Toppings is GO!"

"Targeting?"

"Targeting Huntsville, Alabama. Programming the roll now, Flight... we're Go."

"Roger, Targeting. Thank you, Ladies and Gentlemen. Houston. Large Pepperoni and Sausage with Extra Cheese is GO FOR LAUNCH!

....

"...and launching in 5... 4... 3... 2... 1... GO!"

....

[fade to logo... 'National Anchovy and Sauce Administration. Pizza delivery anywhere in the world in 90 minutes or less!']

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