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Per Horror Movie Survival Tips |
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After you've acquainted yourself with THE BASICS, review the finer points, grouped by category below...
HOME, SWEAT HOME (No, it's not a typo)
KIDS! WHAT'S THE MATTER WITH KIDS, TODAY?
DEMONS AND DEVILS AND HELL, OH MY!
TELEPHONES: REACH OUT & "TOUCH" SOMEONE
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Dolls
1) ANY and ALL dolls are bad! If you see any type of doll at all, whether it be action figure or an African tribal totem, BURN IT!
2) If you throw away some possession of yours (antique dolls and ventriloquist's dummies in particular), and you find it again in your house / car / pockets / etc., move to another country IMMEDIATELY! Of course, it WILL be waiting for you in the car as you go to leave.
3) Never slap around or make fun of a doll because it is possessed by an evil spirit and it will come to life and kill you.
4) Never have puppets lying or hanging around in your room, eventually, they will become possessed and try to kill you.
5) Dolls are inherently evil. Consider them as "Action Figures" for demonic spirits.
6) Never buy your kids a toy that talks back.
7) Make friends with a puppet named Jester.
8) A walking puppet with no strings is not cute.
9) Avoid any doll named "Talking Tina."
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